The Fingerpoke... OF DOOM~!

[Tyronesaurus24]

Just dropping a note that I'm very much keeping up with this. I remember some of the booking to come (in particular one PPV match that I recall being one of the best I've ever read), so the Bret/Flair segment was a treat to read. As for the rest of the show: post-Males Riggs and Scott Putski whenever getting nearly six minutes of TV time in the Wars era should be a fireable offense. Workhorse U.S. Heavyweight Champ Page is a highlight of the story, though that's a little fuzzy for me so I'm excited to see where that leads.

I'm enjoying the ride, but also incredibly impatient to see the new work after the repost. Can't recall if the diary stopped at GAB or right before, but yeah let's keep this going, brotherjackdude.

 

[Szumi]

I think that I got one Nitro or one week post-GAB, and that was it. Goal is to wrap everything up at either BatB, or the ensuing Nitro afterwards, and see how I feel from there.

WCW Thursday Night Thunder
Dallas, Texas
January 28, 1999

It’s time for the best Thursday night wrestling show - past, present, and future! - right here on TBS: The SuperStation! Bobby ‘The Brain’ Heenan is back in the announcer’s booth tonight with ‘The Voice of WCW’ Tony Schiavone and ‘The Professor’ Mike Tenay, and it is going to be a great night of wrestling! We have the final two matches of the Tag Team Tournament’s First Round, and we will have the brackets for the rest of the tournament released tonight as well! Plus, The President of WCW Ric Flair is in the house with the Four Horsemen and he will be out after tonight’s opening contest to discuss the numerous events that transpired on Monday Nitro, AND he has an announcement about tonight’s main event. We don’t know what that match is yet, but Tony has an inside scoop - it will be a title match!

But the real story, wrestling fans? ‘The Macho Man’ Randy Savage is HERE TONIGHT, and he’s going to have a live microphone! We get a recap video of the ending of Monday Nitro and Savage’s return as we get ready for our first contest of the evening…

Blitzkrieg vs. Hector Garza

Storytelling from The Professor tells us that tonight’s curtain jerker comes as a result of Garza challenging the rookie to the contest (approved by the Executive Committee) coming off of Monday Night Nitro because while Garza pinned the masked Blitzkrieg on Nitro, with it coming after Chavo Guerrero abandoned the team, Garza said he, “wanted to leave no doubt he was better than Blitzkrieg.” This allows the commentators to sell Garza’s growing cocky attitude backstage, as he has apparently been telling many backstage that he should be the next challenger for Kidman’s Cruiserweight Title.

Garza gets to display that new bad boy attitude in the match, using several cheap tricks during the contest to spot himself an advantage, while also sliding out of the ring at one point to romance up a particularly good-looking woman in the front row of the audience, trying to give her the ol’ Latino charm. Before he can have the chance to let it work though, Blitzkrieg goes for the spectacular with a Cartwheel Back Flip over the ropes to the apron Asai Moonsault to Garza, all in one smooth fluid motion!!

This match is an absolute spotfest throughout as Blitzkrieg constantly does insane tricks to try and get over, while Garza shows he can match him as well. The masked rookie scores several good sequence moments, one coming after Garza catches his foot. He proceeds to connect with a Corkscrew Enziguri, and then immediately follows up with a Running Shooting Star Press, gets right back up, and hits a Standing Moonsault… yet only for two!!

Garza lands his patented Corkscrew Plancha from the top turnbuckle to the outside to Blitzkrieg, and shows off his underrated strength with a double twirling Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker to the lightweight. While the two men put bodies on the line repeatedly, it is Garza who walks away a winner tonight, starting the closing sequence by recovering quick enough to launch himself at the ropes to crotch Blitz when he ascends to the top turnbuckle looking for his Phoenix Splash that he took from his role model, Hayabusa. That allows Garza to join the rookie in the danger zone, climbing up to the second turnbuckle, using their position to lift him up in the air even higher than the top turnbuckle, and land a ridiculous Super Splash Mountain sit-out Crucifix Bomb for an absolutely amazing pin fall victory!

Winner: Hector Garza at 11:12

The Clinton Impeachment Trial Is Going On IRL, FYI...

We always love a good ‘Mean’ Gene Okerlund interview segment, and it’s always that much better when he is bringing out ‘The Nature Boy’ Ric Flair, and he’s out in tow with The Four Horsemen (and thankfully again, no David Flair). While Ric Flair is dressed in a stylish turtleneck and olive slacks, the rest of the Horsemen are dressed in their gear (obviously Double A is in business casual too). Despite getting kicked in the dick twice on Monday, Flair is still in the mood to start things off right: “MEAN - WOOO! - BAH GAWD! GEEEEENE! It feels good to be here ta’night!”

Okerlund hypes up how he has been told by his trusted sources that President Flair has talked with the Executive Committee and agreed to a title match in tonight’s main event, so Mean Gene isn’t here to beat around the bush: “Mister President, the world wants to know… what kind of title match are these fans going to see tonight?”

Smirking at the question, Flair pleads patience with Okerlund, explaining that to get to the end, we must first start at the beginning and progress naturally. Flair opts to discuss a few things from Nitro instead, talking about how Nitro was more exhausting and grueling for him than his 2/3 Falls Match with Ricky Steamboat. He says that the first person he really wants to address is Bret ‘The Hitman’ Hart, but he’s not sure if he should even waste his breath since Bret Hart didn’t show up here tonight. “You may have kicked mine, Hitman, but I still had THE BALLS to not only get right back up and make a difference on Nitro… but I got THE BALLS! To tell you right here and right now, that I’ll pushin’ your buttons, Hitman! UNTIL YOU… until you decide to get your priorities right, and be THE MAN… you’re supposed to be!”

Okerlund asks what The President has to say about The Macho Man returning on Nitro and helping him and Goldberg against the nWo – “and letting Hollywood Hogan find out what it’s like to be tasered, might I add!” - but a grinning Flair simply says that instead of hearing from The Naitcha Boy about The Macho Man… he’ll just wait for Randy to say it all himself instead later tonight! But, he adds, unable to suppress that classic grin, man was it great to see Hogan shaking on the floor from that taser! Flair transitions as he admits how great it was to see the nWo get a taste of their own medicine. It’s what he wanted on Nitro, it’s what he wants tonight, and it is what he wants EVERY NIGHT… until The Naitcha Boy, The Four Horsemen, and Dubya-See-Dubya as a whole DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE! WHATEVER IT TAKES! …To beat the New World Order.

There’s a long pause as Flair has that intense thousand-yard stare as he trails off, so dedicated and focused on finally ending the nWo. A hand on his shoulder from Double A helps to refocus Flair, and The President informs Mean Gene that that is why tonight, we have a title match in the main event. The nWo prides itself on being The Elite of this industry, on being so good they can take over, so powerful they can take what they want, when they want it. He knows that Hollywood Hogan and Eric Bischoff want to see the nWo have every position of power they can: the Presidency, the World Heavyweight Title, the Tag Team Titles, abolish the Executive Committee, hold every piece of gold they can.

Flair adds, “I said it on Monday Nitro, and it holds true. HOGAN! I can only make that orange skinned GOBLIN defend the belt I made mean SOMETHIN’ once every 30 days. I can barely touch him! But YYOOUU, SCOTTY STEINER! I’m The President, and you’re Monica Lewinsky, pal! I can touch you whenever the hell… I want!” (Yes, I just had Ric Flair say that, you’re welcome).

“I can make you defend that Television Title, EACH…AND EVERY NIGHT, FAT BOY! And that’s why you’re in the main event tonight, Steiner!” Flair adds that because of what happened in the last nWo match, he has permission from the Executive Committee to bar ALL nWo members from ringside tonight… for when Steiner takes on Mongo McMichael! Okerlund of course immediately sells and shills, while the rest of the Horsemen clap a smirking Mongo on the shoulders, revving him up for the challenge.

Okerlund asks Mongo for any thoughts on the match, while also referencing his impressive win he had this past week on Saturday Night (that hardly anyone even knows about, or if they do, who he beat). Cockily chewing gum, Mongo leans over as he flatly says that Scott Steiner may like to call himself Big Poppa Pump and be obsessed with his muscles and look, but tonight… he finds out what raw, real power is all about. And in true Horseman fashion, he’s gonna be galloping out of Texas tonight… TV Champion. As the group flash the four fingers, Mean Gene hypes the newly announced main event up, and of course wishes Mongo the best in bringing the gold home to WCW.

However, as the group starts to exit the ring, a lightbulb hits in the brain of The Dirtiest Player in the Game, and he yells for Gene to wait just a minute. “I can’t believe it, I ALMOST FORGOT,” he yells in excitement. The President adds that while the full brackets for the Tag Team Tournament are going to be released tonight after the final two Qualifying First Round matches, “NEXT MONDAY! Nitrooo… I got a Quarterfinal match-up, that’s worthy… OF THE FINALS! OUTSIDERS! Oooh Big Sexy, you don’t know what sexy is, but I made sure your wife does, pal! Scotty Hall, you think you know how to party, BUT NOBODY… knows how to party… LIKE THE NAITCHA BOY! WOOO! You two boys! My two boys! Wolfpac! Versus! Horsemen! Outsiders versus Benoit and Malenko! Quarterfinals! Monday! WOOO! NITRO!” And that’s how we end the Four Horsemen segment instead…

TAG TEAM TOURNAMENT: Brian Adams & Stevie Ray (w/Vincent & Horace) vs. Glacier & Ice Train

Commentary note how the nWo Black & White were originally going to be represented by Adams and Scott Norton, but the NJPW star has apparently picked up an injury that will see him out (although really, I just felt like Stevie Ray deserved some love), to which The Brain comes in with some good analysis by saying how this might actually help the Black & White because of the un-surmounted tag team experience that Stevie has with Harlem Heat.

The two big men cannot use their size much to their advantage tonight because Ice Train is a big 300 pounder (he’s like an even more jacked up Big E), while Glacier is no vanilla midget himself. That means that this contest is one big hunka burnin’ brawl, with a lot of punch-kick offense, and worked over offense in the corner. It’s also really more of a showcase for Adams and Stevie Ray, as they dominate most of the proceedings, barring a little moment or two in the beginning, and then a hot tag to Glacier.

However, again, showcase contest to remind fans that while the Black & White are not Elite members, they are still a competent force to be reckoned with on their day, I mean, kind of. So with that said, when Ice Train gets tossed from the ring by Adams, it’s all too easy for Stevie Ray to finish Glacier off with his version of the Pedigree, the much better named Slapjack. The “Frozen Fruit Booties” lose (as Stevie calls them into the hard camera after the match, to go along with some of his classic mugging of the camera), and we have one more team advancing into the Quarterfinals.

Winners: Brian Adams & Steve Ray at 4:49

Midcard Mic Moments! Mmmliteration

We need more Mean Gene in our lives, and that is why he is in the entrance aisle for another interview, and he has been wanting to hear from these two men, on their team and singles success to start the year, Booker T and Perry Saturn! The two men come out to no entrance music at all, so as not to show preference for one man, and both men dressed in what could be considered… stylish… dress clothes with ridiculous prints on their silk button downs, and Saturn wearing a fucking absurd ushanka style hat. It is winter, I guess, to be fair. Mean Gene talks about the success both men have had to start the year so far - Booker T undefeated this year and having defeated Hugh Morrus at Souled Out, Saturn having won that incredible I Quit match at the same show - so with that being said, what brings about this tag team?

Booker informs Mean Gene dat he respects Perry Saturn a whole hella lot. “You got game, dawg,” he says to his partner, n’ he particularly loved da way he put Chris Jericho through dem tables at Souled Out. Book adds dat for far too long, not enough people noticed just how good Saturn is, but now, suckas know dat Saturn can raise da roof n’ burn dis house down… “and we goin’ raise it all da way ta’ SuperBrawl, Genie-boy!”

The cross-eyed Saturn adds that when an opportunity presents itself to win the Tag Team Championship, you take it. President Flair making the tournament open to so many teams, he knew there would be spots open for new teams as well. “Me? I’m a bit of a loner these days! Raven? The Flock? I’d rather be a Gargoyle than a sheep… but Booker T? Now this is a guy I’m willing to give my stamp of approval to!”

Both men explain to Okerlund that this is a team of convenience for right now, a chance for both men to win the Tag Team Championship, but if things work out the way they’re planning… “den you gonna be seein’ Booka T n’ Perry Saturn rockin’ dis solar system fo’ a long time ta’ come!” Saturn adds that both of them are still pursuing any singles matches and championship opportunities that come their way because the only thing better than being a Tag Team Champion? Holding two belts at the same time. “Now can you dig THAT!?” Booker rhetorically asks in his trademark saying to Gene as he wishes the two men the best of luck in the tournament.

Konnan (w/Rey Mysterio Jr.) vs. Norman Smiley (w/o Pepe)

We get a little video recap of some of the background going on here, from Konnan’s feud with Lex Luger and The Wolfpac (that he has kind of put on hold), Norman Smiley’s feud with Chavo Guerrero, including winning the Pepe on a Pole match at Souled Out to take possession of him, and Konnan trying to get Chavo back to being a Guerrero instead of a Loco after telling him the nWo is responsible for Eddy’s real-life car accident, but Chavo’s craziness continued. Konnan’s confrontation from last week on Thunder when he attacked Smiley when he goaded Chavo is featured, and Smiley attacking Chavo on Nitro when Chavito had pinned Disco Inferno to the wall in his quest for to regain Pepe.

As the contest gets ready to start and the combatants make their entrance, commentary tell us that Konnan had actually challenged Smiley to this match for Nitro, but his and Mysterio’s First Round match in the tournament pre-empted the contest to tonight instead. The Brain also jokes that Smiley has put Pepe in the stables for the night since he’s not riding him to the ring, although he does add on the somewhat serious side that the reason he has Pepe quartered is to make sure no one – i.e. Chavo – can steal him while he’s wrestling, even saying that Smiley told him Pepe is being watched by someone tonight too!

Like a man with a point to prove, Konnan comes out firing in this one, his fire and passion exploding over several times as he goes to fight the Britishman, not wrestle him. It means that referee Charles Robinson has his hands full, having to enforce several five counts because of Konnan’s closed-fisted punches, or trying to still go after Black Magic even when he is in the corner. Normally a very vibrant, exuberant individual, Smiley is hardly able to show that side of him in the contest because of Konnan’s aggression, having to take several moments to tie himself up into the ropes or escape to the outside to avoid Konnan’s wrath. However, this contest never gets past much of that because as the two men do their thing in the ring, Konnan’s partner and cheerleader for the night is completely blindsided… by Disco Inferno…

…who hits him in the back of the head with PEPE!!!

Somehow that damn soft as hell, stuff head of a horse on a stick is effective (lol, wrestling) as it does Rey-Rey in, and then allows Disco to grab him by the back of the head and slam him face first into the ring post! That throws Konnan’s attention to Inferno, sliding out of the ring to start a fight with him too! Smiley joins in moments later, double sledging K-Dawg from behind, and Robinson just throws the match out, knowing what’s about to happen.

Winner: No Contest at 5:13

What happens is the numbers game are too strong for the spirit and tenacity of Konnan, and Smiley and Disco end up beating him down to a prone position, stopping only to pick him up so he can get the same treatment as his partner, but the two men run and whip him into the post together, meaning Konnan can’t protect himself as he goes face first into the post!!

Disco gives Mysterio a good kick afterwards as well, and now the heels can celebrate it up, taking turns of Smiley riding Pepe and Inferno working that right arm like a teenage boy, but you know, with disco. Disco makes it a point to grab a nearby camera so he can say something to the TV audience, sending a clear message, “this is what happens when you’re a problem for The Wolfpac! Flexy Lexy, Big Kev, Scotty The Body! I hope you were watchin’ this, boys! Tonight was for you!” As Tony bemoans the lack of Chavo Guerrero Jr. for not trying to help Konnan and Rey, Heenan muses that he’s probably in the back sitting in a corner and weeping because he saw Pepe between the legs of another man.

The Madness Is Here, Ooo Yeaaahhh!

Everyone has been waiting since the end of Monday Night Nitro to hear “Pomp and Circumstance” and since WCW is the best wrestling promotion in the world, you only had to wait until Thursday night instead of next Monday! ‘The Macho Man’ Randy Savage is here, and he once again has a stunning young blonde on his arm! The crowd is absolutely popped to see The Macho Man live and in color, and despite the stance against the nWo, the colors of Savage are all black himself, his shirt skintight and shiny like he is leaving Thunder and going right to a nightclub. To be fair, with the cut off shirt and micro-skirt his exceptionally young lady friend is wearing, they might actually be going to a club after the show. In the meantime, Savage is in the ring, mic in hand after posing on all four of the ring corners, and gives the fan an easy cheap pop as he says, “OOO yyyeeeaaahhh! The MACHO MAAN… has returned! Can ya dig it!?” The cheers indicate that they have a shovel, as they can indeed dig it.

Savage professes that outside of one appearance a month ago, it’s been quite a long time since the Macho Man has been in a WCW ring. And he’s been gone for so long because Hulk Hogan and the New World Order chewed him up, spat him out, and busted his knee in the process, ohhh yeaaahhh. Ever since then, The Madness has been buildin’ inside of him, brewin’ up a storm that only Randy Savage calm, “but the problem is, The Macho Man ain’t here to calm the storm, brother! The Macho Man is standin’ in a WCW ring to let The Madness run wild, OOO yyyeeeaaahhh!”

Savage booms that when he showed up a month ago, it was to make Eric Bischoff pay the pied piper for his part in potentially ending his career. He didn’t know if he wanted to get back in a ring anymore, especially after what the New World Order did to his knee. Savage admits he’s had a great run, won World Titles, and made a lifetime of friends and memories. He was content to kick back in a tropical paradise with Gorgeous George over here, but as he’s watched Hogan run his mouth about him this past month, takin’ potshots and jabs, “it got The Madness brewin’ agaaain, jack! The Madness was caalm all those months, baby, but yoouu, Hogan! You stoked a little campfire into a BONFIRE, a bonfiiire that’s gonna BUUURN all of California to the ground, Holl’aywood! Dig it, brother!”

His eyes bugging out like crazy as he says that threat, Savage loves to soak in the crowd’s response to him. Savage says that if Hogan wants to play pretend President games and run his mouth, then meet the man whose Supreme Justice, jack! “HOGAN! The Macho Man is hungry! He’s hungry to get his hands on YOU, Hogan! And when I do, Hulkster, The Macho Man is gonna punch that big mouth of yours shut, OOO yyyeeeaaahhh! No more runnin’ your mouth then, Hogan!”

Savage adds that the n-Dubya-o can blame all of the pain and suffering he’s going to bring to them all on Hogan, “because Hulkster, you and I got one final battle in the Immortal War, ooh yeaaahhh! The Macho Man ain’t gonna stop until I bury you into the ground, Hogan… and it don’t matter how many bodies The Madness gotta go through in the process! Time’s tickin’, Hogan! I diiigg it!” His eyes crazier than ever as he stares menacingly into the camera as he ends his promo, Savage’s words and eyes make his intention incredibly clear, if it wasn’t already from Nitro: he’s comin’ for Hogan, one last time.

Lifestyles of the Rich and the Famous Sociopathic

It's time for another check in on the man who calls himself Raven, and we're back in the beautiful Florida mansion of Mrs. Levy. Not much has seemingly changed in the life of Raven, the anti-social sociopath laying on the couch in his bathrobe, underwear, and socks. He is reading a wrestling magazine from the 80s, with Roddy Piper on the cover. Except for, you know, the magazine is upside down, which tells you the focus that he actually is having right now. Mrs. Levy comes into the scene and asks if reading his favorite magazines from when he was younger is helping him cheer up, to which a monotone Raven simply mutters, "sure, Mom."

When mother sees he isn't even trying to read it, she starts to chide him, stating the obvious about him not reading it, and that she wouldn't have had "Christopher" get them for him if he wasn't going to read them. Raven whines in retort that it doesn't matter, all things are pointless anyways, and he'll just leave him anyways. "Everyone always leaves," he utters in the most emo tone ever.

Mrs. Levy scolds "Scotty" for saying such a thing, and that she's still here, and trying everyday to get him the help he needs. Persistent in his theory, Raven coldly snips that she only 'cares' because he's famous and "they're" here, nodding to the camera crew filming them. Mrs. Levy looks mortally offended as she dramatically scoffs, hand over her heart at the heartache caused. Mrs. Levy promises Scotty that the "wrestling cameras" have nothing to do with this, and she wants to see him happy and healthy; it's why she's still trying to get him to take his medications and start seeing Dr. Nygard again, his therapist!

It's at this point that Raven throws his magazine across the room, shouting that if she wants to help him, she can get him a new family! "You never loved me, Mom! You drove Dad away, so I grew up neglected! My real family has abandoned me! What about me, huh!? When does Raven get to be loved!?" Fearful of her son's wrath, Mrs. Levy calls for "Christopher" to come here.

A cut to the kitchen shows us Christopher, or at least the plumber's crack of Kanyon, as he's under the sink. Hearing his name called, he suddenly gets up, smacking his head off the underside of the kitchen counter. Walking from the kitchen into the living room holding his head, Kanyon asks if Mrs. Levy needs something else. "I cleaned all your pipes out real good Mrs. Levy! What's next? Snake the drain!?" The joyful exuberance and obvious euphuisms causes a fourth-wall breaking roll of the eyes by Raven, and he flops back down onto the couch, covering his face with a pillow, physically and mentally shutting down as a puppy-like Kanyon just looks on confused as to what he's done wrong.

TAG TEAM TOURNAMENT: Chris Jericho & Wrath (w/Ralphus) vs. Faces of Fear (w/Jimmy Hart)

Chris Jericho comes out for this match in a wheelchair, Ralphus still pushing him, and when he gets to the end of the aisle and beginning of the ringside protective mats, he takes several deep breaths, preparing like an Olympic jumper before springing through the air, landing on his foot that’s not still in a walking boot, with the arms up in the air and everything to stick the landing like Dominique Moceanu (that’s an Olympic medalist gymnast for any of those reading 25 years in the future >_<).

Wrath, who comes out individually, is complete stone faced, not conceding an inch to Jericho’s antics. However, Wrath has to carry the bulk of the offense during the match because as soon as Jericho sees who his opponents are – the gargantuans of Meng and The Barbarian – the self-proclaimed Paragon of Virtue insists that with his walking boot on, he needs ample time to warm up and prepare!

That means Wrath ends up carrying the bulk of the load for the complete makeshift team, Jericho doing his best to sound a whole lot like The Mouth of the South shouting through his megaphone, except for Jericho needs no megaphone to amplify his voice box as he shouts instructions at Wrath during the contest, making sure to also voice how he himself would be doing better in various ways. That results in Wrath, after putting Barbarian down on the mat following a One-Arm Underhook Suplex, to forcefully tag Jericho in the match, using some hand gestures to make it clear that if it’s so easy, he should do it. It leads to significant begging and pleading from Jericho, to which he loses, and all that time trying to make Wrath do it all results in Barbarian having more than enough time to nearly behead the obnoxious Canucker with a Clothesline!

Despite being the biggest heel in the match, his size disadvantage, and potential injuries that commentary certainly can’t decide if they’re real, leads to Jericho actually becoming the face in peril for the night, the savages being able to use their size to look absolutely dominant. While the equally physically impressive Wrath was quick to insert Jericho into the match, the big man is not here to take a loss – everyone wants the accolade, prestige, and extra money that comes with being a Champion in the biggest company in the world! (acc. to Schiavone) – and he inserts himself back into the match several times to ensure Jericho doesn’t take a loss for the team. When the lightweight is finally able to find an opening to make the hot tag, doing so after reversing a Vertical Suplex into a modified Hangman’s Neckbreaker, the Faces of Fear learn quickly that despite their savage traits, Wrath is a man on a whole different level.

Fresh and energized, he’s able to completely mow through both men single handedly, a feat that has Schiavone and Heenan both gushing with compliments. Meng is forced to come in as the illegal man to save Barbarian, but he ends up just taking a Big Boot near the ropes that sends the Tongan up and over the ropes. Barbarian is in serious jeopardy when Wrath his sit-out Uranage that he calls the Death Penalty, but before the former Adam Bomb can make his opponent feel his thermonuclear Meltdown, Jericho blind tags himself into the match!?

As Wrath sticks his arms out in annoyance and disbelief, Jericho sneaks into the match, and as Barbarian pulls himself up to his hands and knees, Jericho runs and knocks his lights out with a Field Goal kick… with the walking boot! Barbarian looks legit knocked out from it, and Jericho scores the pin fall victory as a result!

Schiavone and Tenay are stunned by the effects of the kick, even with the added force of the walking boot, while Heenan makes another timely pop culture reference – “just like Morten Anderson! Game over baby!” – as he was the man to sink the game-winning field goal in overtime for the Falcons in the NFC Championship game. Wrath even seems skeptical by the finish, and as Jericho celebrates over the top for his “excellent contribution” (his words) to the victory, a replay shows just why the kick was so effective – while Wrath was kicking ass, Ralphus handed Jericho a metal place that Jericho inserted into the bottom of the boot! It was loaded!

Winners: Chris Jericho & Wrath at 6:12

All Of The Rambling

There is no backstage interviewer for this one, but we are backstage, and in fact, it’s actually a mix of a backstage promo and traditional nWo style vignette as there’s no pre-recorded promos or jump cuts, but Scott Steiner is backstage somewhere, the screen is black and white, and “Rockhouse” is playing over top of it all. “So Dick Flair wants to try and make Big Poppa Pump a martyr tonight, huh!? Can’t touch Hogan, but can touch me?? Yeah, Flair, I bet you’d love to touch the Big Bad Booty Daddy! They all do! We are in Texas, and only two things come from Texas - steers and queers - and you don’t look much like a steer, so it ain’t no surprise what chu are and that you wanna touch these peaks, just like all the other freaks! Well Big Poppa Pump don’t swing that way! The only way Scott Steiner swings is the door to your wife’s house, Dick Flair! Mrs. Flair is used to Space Mountain bein’ broke cowboy. She knew that when she wanted some action, to call the Big Bad Booty Daddy for some satisfaction!” Steiner laughs at his great digs. Also, I’ve missed writing for this man.

“Dick Flair, you can keep tryin’ to throw vanilla midgets or overpaid, overrated hacks who couldn’t cut it somewhere else. I’ll beat ‘em all! I got the peaks that can’t be beat, bay-bay! Big Poppa Pump is the TV Champ, and that ain’t gonna change! Only change gonna be happenin’ tonight is the Big Bad Booty Daddy givin’ some change to the freaks that end up in mah hotel tonight for a cab ride home… ‘cause that’s the classy kinda guy I am! Some freaks tonight are gonna know that there’s nothin finer than Scott Steiner, and Mongo… tonight you’re gonna get a broken neck and look like a chump… by Big Poppa Pump! So to all mah freaks out here in Dallas tonight, Big Poppa Pump is your hook up! Holler, if ya’ heard all that!” Man, Scott Steiner, what a legend.

The One Man Team

Thunder is backstage in a hallway to catch a glimpse of Chris Jericho & Ralphus as the two look to be leaving for the night, Ralphus of course carrying the several bags of Jericho, almost falling in the process of trying to deal with it all. Jericho immediately yells and scold Ralphus for it, reminding him of the “serious medical equipment” in the one bag that “without it, I may be forced to have several surgeries and amputations! Do you want to be the reason all of the Jericholics are deprived of The Ayatollah!?”

As Ralphus nods his head in understanding, the two men are forced to halt in their tracks by a yelling and oncoming Wrath. The man who is still trying to make a mullet kind of hairstyle cool barges up to the two, demanding to know what in the hell tonight was all about. The 6’8 275 pound beast booms that he agreed to be Jericho’s partner in the tournament for only three reasons: 1) Jericho told him he was healthy and ready to compete. 2) He was promised no shenanigans. 3) He wants to be a Champion and he needed a partner. And after tonight, he feels like the only way he ends up winning the Tag Titles is if he does it by himself, or just decides to make Ralphus his partner instead!

As Ralphus perks up in absolute delight at the prospect of being a Tag Team Champion, Jericho immediately shuts that down, retorting “while Ralphus has many undeniable qualities, of which I’m yet to figure out a single one, you’re better off wrestling with a child than Ralphus!” Wrath, of course, has a good retort as well, rebutting that tonight made him feel like that’s exactly who his partner in! Scoffing, repeatedly and over the top with it, Jericho cannot believe that Wrath would make such scandalous accusations about both Jericho’s character and physical stature!

“I’m a grown man, baby, and a sexy beast at that!” he yells, clearly not getting that Wrath was in no way shape or form making a comment on his shorter stature. Jericho adds that the only shenanigans he plays are witty and successful, not cruel and maleficent! Jericho professes that he is the reason why they won tonight, and if Wrath “wants numero tres” to happen, he’s going to have to pick up the pace, bub. Jericho then tells Ralphus to keep a steppin’, and the two men leave the show, Jericho making sure to give Wrath’s face a little light-clap love touch on the way out. Wrath’s angry, heavy breathing as he scowls and watches the two all the way out of the arena is for sure the sign of a man who is regretting his decision to team up with The Paragon of Virtue!

WCW TELEVISION TITLE: Scott Steiner © vs. Steve McMichael

With all of the New World Order barred from the ringside, commentary inform us that Mongo McMichael has opted to have ‘The Enforcer’ Arn Anderson not at ringside as a result, apparently wanting to show Big Poppa Pump on his own, a decision The Brain absolutely hates. “What an idiot!” he bemoans. “Here’s your chance to take a piece of gold away from the nWo, and you decide to be a good little boy. Mongo? More like mongoloid, Tony! I thought the Four Horsemen didn’t wear white hats!” While Heenan is absolutely right, it’s still a singles match, and while the Horseman brings his raw power and NFL-caliber winning psychology, Scott Steiner is not just muscles. The Champion is able to match Mongo’s strength throughout the contest, and utilize his Michigan University experience to stay even with Mongo whenever the Horseman looks to be making a match-altering decision in his favor.

The match is a lot of brawling and rest holds, each man trying to find the opening they need to really turn the match in their favor. Big Poppa Pump looks like he does just that when he reverses a Mongo whip to send the big man into the corner turnbuckles with such force that he rebounds out of them, Mongo staggering right into a patented Steiner Spinning Belly-to-Belly Suplex! That helps Steiner to then hit two more, this time the Overhead variations, within the next two minutes, softening him up for the Steiner Recliner, but Mongo blocks it!

Steiner gets himself in position right over top of Mongo to apply it, but the strength of Mongo sees him lift both himself and the TV Champion off the ground, essentially having Steiner on his back like he’s giving him a piggy back… and runs backwards so he crushes Steiner into the turnbuckles! He walks out next, falls backwards, and slams Steiner to the canvas! Cover – but it’s only a near count!

That changes the tides for Mongo, and he shows his strength by giving Steiner a taste of his own medicine, connecting with a Spinning Belly-to-Belly Suplex for another near fall! The Four Horseman lifts up the fingers and calls for his Mongo Spike tombstone. Schiavone is having an aneurism; we’re about to see a title change all WCW fans want to see! Mongo scoops Steiner up for it – but Big Poppa Pump slips out and behind!

Steiner channels his brother as he immediately counters, leaping into the air and driving Mongo to the canvas with the Bulldog! And now the Steiner Recliner gets locked in by the TV Champion! Steiner traps his foe right in the center of the ring so no arm or foot can get to a rope, using those ridiculous peaks of his to squeeze tight around Mongo’s throat and jaw. It’s either quit or pass out for Mongo, and senior official Mickey Jay is right there to see what the decision will be the whole way. Mongo’s a true warrior, a Horseman, and he will not quit… but he also will not escape the Steiner Recliner! Mongo passes out, and after a check of the arm by the referee, Steiner is declared the winner!

Winner: Scott Steiner to retain the WCW Television Championship at 7:23

Having proven himself capable of vetoing Ric Flair’s presidential plan tonight, Steiner celebrates the big win as expected, but the rest of nWo Wolfpac Elite (minus Hollywood Hogan, of course; this is Thunder!) have other plans for Mongo! Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Lex Luger, and Buff Bagwell are walking through the crowd just moments after the match, Hall wielding that trusty taser, while Bagwell’s got the spray paint. It’s time for a good ole fashioned tagging and bagging…

…but The Four Horsemen are already marching out from the back… and so is GOLDBERG and RANDY SAVAGE!!!!!

The cavalry is indeed here tonight, and instead of The Wolfpac looking to put Mongo out of commission, it’s Big Poppa Pump hastily retreating from the ring, climbing the security rail and briskly heading out through the ringside seats and up to the 100 Level where the rest of the band is at. It means that while the New World Order is victorious tonight against the Four Horsemen and WCW, Thunder will end with the good guys all standing tall, Double A and Malenko helping Mongo to his feet while Savage, Flair, and Goldberg especially all lean over the ropes or climb the buckles to shout promises of what’s to come to The Wolfpac, Hall and Nash both making sure to do their trademark pantomime of fear…